Whiskey for my men and beer for my...puppy?

Despite being only six weeks old, my new puppy Alex does pretty well at sleeping through the night. Of course, I have to get up three or four times to take him out, but he usually goes back to sleep pretty quickly, without too much crying.

Last night, though, was a different story. I ended up being 40 minutes late to work this morning because I overslept. I overslept because Alex cried off and on (mostly on) for an hour and half last night. And why did my fairly well-adapted pup decided to cry all night? Probably because his tummy hurt. Why did his tummy hurt, you ask?

Hmmmm....could it be because one of our neighbors was walking by early yesterday evening while Randi was outside with Alex, wanted to hold Alex, and then, while she was holding him, gave him some of the beer she had in her hand?!?

Now aside from the question of why a 40-year-old woman is walking down the street drinking beer at 5:30 on a Wednesday night, why in the hell would you give beer to a puppy who is six weeks old and weighs five pounds??? And doesn't even belong to you??? Are Randi and I just magnets for dysfunctional neighbors, or what? And I haven't even gone into the lady who lives across the street and hides behind cars so she can eavesdrop on conversations...

Celebrations of all kinds

So much has happened since I last posted but I'll try my best to summarize. I took a trip last weekend back to my old stomping grounds in Bowling Green and stayed with some friends on the way there and on the way back. Visiting BG always feels like going home. It's so familiar and it's the first place I came into my own as an adult. I love that feeling. Speaking of good feelings... the biggest news is that my brother got married this past Saturday. It was a beautiful ceremony in a 200-year-old opera house in our hometown and Kylie and I got to be bridesmaids. It was beautiful and sad and wonderful with all of those other mixed feelings. I was so happy to be a part of it. Everyone had a great time. On Sunday, we threw mom a surprise party for her 50th birthday. We had family and friends over for a cook-out at Kylie's new house and everyone seemed to enjoy it. I got to talk to so many family members and they were all excited for me moving to California. I made the official decision several weeks ago but with everything going on around here, I didn't have time to think about it. Now that I can take a breath, I'm so excited about it and even a little sad. I plan on heading west July 17th so I have less than three weeks to see and do everything I want with my family. It's not nearly enough but I'm so glad I had the past two months with them. I got to decorate for my brother's wedding, help hang drywall at my sister's house and spend extra time with my parents. I'm constantly on an emotional roller coaster ride. When I start thinking about everything going on , I feel like I could laugh and cry at any moment. I'm so fortunate to have these people in my life and so grateful for their love and support. Everyone should be so lucky.

We're going to the chapel...

I just want to let everyone know, you are all invited to my wedding--I mean, my fellow blogging sisters, not everyone on the World Wide Web. Ok, to be fair, I have no idea when it will be yet, but when I find out I will definitely let you know.

But I do know who the groom will be. I've decided that I'm going to marry Bob. I announced this to my roommate Randi about a week ago, and she looked at me like I was crazy, then spouted some nonsense about maybe he might want to have a say in that decision. I don't know why I need his imput--shouldn't I be able to decide all by myself who I'm going to marry?

I do need to issue an apology, though, to Sharif Atkins. I have been pledging to marry Sharif (a.k.a. hot Gallant on E.R.) for about two years now. I'm sorry to break my promise Sharif, but I don't think you'll be that heartbroken, and I never have quite figured out how I was going to arrange to meet you, let alone marry you. Goodbye, fair doctor.

So back to me marrying Bob. It might be a long way off, but I just have a feeling that's where this is all eventually leading. And I think the odds are a lot better than they were with Sharif. So what spurred my sudden confidence? Well, I've kind of felt this way for awhile, and his actions lately have made me believe he is considering dating, despite his concerns about working together. Then the other day, I was talking to a girl I work with, and she said she was talking to him about us, and he said his biggest concern is that I will want to have kids, and he thinks he's too old now to have kids.

Point number one--I don't want to have kids. Point number two--if he's talking about whether or not both of us would want kids, he's obviously seeing this going somewhere. It was right then that I decided for sure--we're going to get married. :) So... who wants to be a bridesmaid?

Stupid

Every once in awhile I do something so stupid, I amaze even myself.

For the museum's biggest annual event, we have to follow some pretty strict guidelines set by the entertainment company that brings it to us. Last year, they hired a communications company that I had to report to for marketing material, including submitting a marketing plan. This year, they decided to handle it all in-house, and the rep we're working with is just anal.

We waited forever to get the material we needed for the web site. When we finally got it, the one page used a font/background color combination that was literally painful to try to read (light blue background with yellow font), and when I emailed our contact to express my concern, he never bothered to respond to me.

Last week, I get an email forwarded to me by Kelly, who is in charge of the event at the museum level, from this guy, reminding us that the marketing plan is due in "the next week or two." Since we had a big event this weekend, I planned on submitting it later this week. Well, she forwarded me another email over the weekend, again reminding us of the deadline, and not so nicely.

So I sent an email to Kelly saying I would take care of it, but saying it was kind of ridiculous that they were being so impatient when we'd had to wait on them so much. Except...I didn't send the reply to Kelly, I sent it to our contact accidentally. Oops.

So he sent a nasty email to Kelly, who called me this morning: "Did you send me an email yesterday? Or thought you sent me an email?" He also copied the email to his boss. Shit.

Luckily, his boss knows we put on a good event, and was actually unhappy with him for responding in the way he did to an email that was obviously not intended to be sent to him...and she assigned us a new rep! Not sure how I got so lucky, but next time I'll double check who my actual recipients are before I send a nasty reply to an email.

Where have all the good songs gone?

They sure don't write songs like they used to. I've been listening to a mix from the 1980s and I must say – I'm singing them horribly at the top of my lungs and I could care less. I think GAP should do another line of commercials where a regular person, maybe with some friends, is standing in front of the classic white background and singing/playing/dancing their favorite song while showing off the newest jeans. What song would I sing for my 30-second spot? I can't decide between “Tainted Love” by Soft Cell or “I Love Rock 'n Roll” by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts.
Listening to my mix also got me thinking how certain songs remind you of a specific time and/or person. Here's a few for me.
“(Everything I Do) I Do It For You” by Bryan Adams – It was a seventh-grade dance and the boy I was dating at the time, Adam, sang it softly while we slow-danced in the gymnasium. Sigh...
“Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond – One of many great songs on the jukebox at the Brathaus, one of my college bar haunts. My friends and I, along with everyone else, would sing this and add parts to it. Such good times!
“Play That Funky Music White Boy” by Wild Cherry – My former roommate, April, and I absolutely loved the movie “Evolution” when the three main character sang this classic after killing an alien bird. We'd sing and dance right along with them. To this day we still leave messages on each other's machines singing that song or make bird calls like Seann William Scott. (KA KAH! KA KAH!)
“Islands in the Stream” by Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton – My other former roomie, Jen, and I would shoot pool very Monday night with some friends. Monday was also retro-night at this particular bar so we'd be lining up a shot when you'd hear Kenny and Dolly belt their hearts out. We'd laugh so hard and wouldn't hit a thing.
“Dirrty” by Christina Aguilera – I always request this song at a club because not only is it great to dance to but it reminds me of Kim and Jeff and dancing with them at Uptown. I've actually picked up a couple guys dancing to this song.
“Hollaback Girl” by Gwen Stefani – Right before I left Greenwood, Caroline, Shavonne, Megan and I were trying to figure out what the heck she was saying on the car rides to and from Greenville. For the life of me, I still can't spell bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-N-A-S?

Open Says Me

I'm walking into closed doors and that's not figuratively. I'm literally walking into doors – stubbing my toes, banging my knees or smashing my nose. It started happening at night while I was trying to feel around in the dark. (Everyone sleeps with their doors open because of the air-conditioning and they're usually in bed before 10 p.m. So I keep the lights off as a common courtesy.) At first I thought it was because I wasn't used to my surroundings, but it's not like the walls moved. They're in the same places they've been my entire life. I'm sure for the common observer it would be hilarious to see me - not even slowing pace - running straight into a door. If it just happened at night I wouldn't care so much but the doors are popping up unexpectedly during the day. I feel like a Stooge. I started to wonder if walking into doors is going to be a metaphor that'll soon become familiar in other aspects of my life. Does each closed door represent a decision I need to make? Am I too afraid to take risks and open those doors? And what will eventually be the best way to open those doors – by knocking politely or forcing my way in with my chainsaw blazing? Could I be exhibiting lost memories from a previous life when I was the goat behind door No. 2 from Let's Make a Deal? Or am I just grabbing at straws to avoid admitting I'm a klutz who really needs to start paying attention to her environment? I think it's the latter. At least I haven't done any real damage yet – no blood or nasty bruises. Either way, let's hope I can recover soon. Maybe I should have mom draw me a map.

Back to grade school

I feel like I am in third grade, and I sit in front of the little boy who has a crush on me, who shows it by pulling my ponytail.

Y'all know about my whole thing with Bob, the older guy I work with, who has made it very clear since almost Day One that he likes me, but once I started to like him back, decided it was too risky to date someone he worked with. I swear--at work, we act like we're dating, but without anything physical. And for someone who is almost twice my age, he turns into a big kid around me, picking on my constantly.

We went to lunch today, and there was this wierd guy sitting in the booth behind Bob that was just staring at me non-stop. Finally I lean forward toward Bob, so the guy can't see me, and whisper, "There's a really creepy guy behind you who keeps staring at me." So Bob responds, very loudly, "What?!? There's a creepy guy behind me who keeps staring at you?" The guy was not even six inches from Bob's face.

I was mortified. My face was burning red, and then I had to sit there crouched down so Bob was between the guy and me so couldn't see me. Of course, Bob found the situation hilarious, and decided to repeat himself a time or two more, while I threatened, "Shut up! Stop it! Shut up!" to no avail. It was so embarassing, and I could have killed him, but at the same time, I found him absolutely adorable. He just loves getting to me like that, because all the time that I am blushing bright red and fussing furiously at him, I also can't stop smiling at him.

It's so frustrating! It's so obvious that we would be great together, and yes, the age thing and the working together thing are going to present some obstacles, but we get along so well. And I really think he's getting to the point where maybe he'd be willing to date, but he's not going to come out and say that.

So ladies--any advice on seducing him?